About love

So we talked about love:
I said, forever
You said, whenever
I said, endeavour
You said, whatever
I said, not clever
You said, no never
I said, been nice knowing you
but hey baby we’re through.
You said, whatever
I thought, so true,
But baby I’m singin’ the blues.

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Sleep talkin’

I hear y’talkin’ in y’sleep
Y’know y’always on repeat
I said y’talkin’ in y’sleep again

Y’sowed y’words now go an’ reap
An’ leave ma bed ‘cos I can’t sleep
Y’sowed y’words an’ now I weep again

I know you’ve left me far behind
An’ still y’hide behind closed eyes
I know I’m not inside y’mind no more

So let me sleep
Just let me sleep
Let me sleep

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Life Love

So y’take me by the hand
An’ we run into the night

Where the trees grow fairy lights
an’ the birds are singin’ hymns

Then y’squeeze a berry ‘tween y’lips
T’release the first mulled wine

An’ make a coat out of a piece of sky
Ma stars are shinin’ bright

Y’say I’m lookin’ fine…

An’ I say my oh my oh my
Life is divine

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Heatwave

Ma baby’s
drinkin’
rum

An’ his arms are sticky
An’ the shade ain’t helpin’

He sighs so deeply
An’ he looks straight at me

An’ his fingers
tap his
glass

With his eyes half open
He surveys the table
An’ the heatwave
makes him
hum

Then he winks
an’ sips
his rum

An’ his shadow stretches
An’ his face gets darker

Then he kisses me g’night
Puttin’ sweet words in ma mouth

An’ ma baby’s
comin’
home

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Sleep Pattern

There’s a gaping hole
In my bedroom floor
Where hands lie in wait
To catch the fall
Of my conscious mind
As it rolls out of my sight

My consciousness
Changes colour and shape
When it’s moulded by
Those ethereal hands
To form a dream
Which is raised up to the light

There’s a gaping hole
In my bedroom floor
Where my dreams begin
Then roll back to me
To be fused with my third eye
Underneath my pulsing sky

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Never

Life doesn’t understand
Sometimes
Y’don’t know where to go
But on y’go
An’ though you try an’ take it slow…
It’s never so

Sometimes life takes y’by the hand
Until y’feelin’ in control
An’ then it lets y’go
Y’try an’ keep the flow…
It’s never so

So here I am

An’ as I’m layin’ in m’bed
Repeatin’ all the words we said
I’m growin’ old y’know
But no, y’words aren’t old…
They’re made of soul

As ma frame holds onto ma life
Keepin’ ma pumpin’ heart inside
I wonder how y’keep so calm an’ in control
Me I’m on the road…
Tryin’ to let go

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Again

There you are again
No need to speak
My eyes catch the flicker of your movements, like butterflies
Each thought
Each glance
Each twitch
I have them all, collectively they sing.

There you are again
My eyes absorb the rhythm of your breath, under your shirt
Each crease
Each mark
Each fold
I see them all, a story’s told.

You cannot hide from me
Subconsciously I process all, even your deepest vein
I dream to reveal more.

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Horizon of Ellipses

My ear
Balances on the edge of right
It strains to your thoughts
As they drift into sight

My frown
Balances my head to the left
It clocks and it stops in its tracks

And controversy
Swirls
Swells
Dwells in my iris
My mind was deceived
My eye frantically plans an escape
Target locked
Not too late
A horizon of ellipses
Comes into view
My story continues
Without you

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November 2014

Hello and welcome

I grew up listening to rap and so my love of words began. 

I am now 38, and in June 2014 I decided to publish my poems on a blog. I have written over 400 short poems in the last few months, but recently culled almost 200 of them. A cathartic exercise. They are sitting in my virtual trash can!

The purpose of my blog is to find my poetry voice. I deeply admire poets with a distinctive style. I have been through a few phases including classical romantic, haiku, writer’s block and nonsense verse. I wrote 50 short very nonsensical verses in September 2014 though they are not currently on my blog.

I’m now in a lyric verse phase. I love the sound of certain words, the repetition of words, the way words can merge or clash to great effect. I’ve recently come across” jazz poetry” and I feel an affinity with it. The 1920s-30s is one of my favourite periods in terms of creativity.

I wonder what kind of writer I will be when I “grow up”, I will probably decide I am always growing but never becoming!

I read poetry everyday on Twitter and have started borrowing books from my library again. I enjoy reading Noel Coward, Oscar Wilde, T S Eliot, Thomas Hardy, Edward Lear and I am keen to read more Langston Hughes.

Here is something about the rest of me:

My life so far has been a series of job-related phases, I’ve worked as a lawyer, designer, personal assistant, sales person … each aspect satisfied a different part of me at the time and I’ve met many wonderful people along the way.

I love Strauss waltzes, Chopin, The Rat Pack, R&B, hip hop, dancing, surrealist art, interval running, healthy food, Radio 4, synchronicity, and above all, words.

I am an INFJ.

All words in this blog are my own. All photos are my own other than the one of me above, that was taken by a talented friend in Berlin.

Once a month I will post an “About Me” update on my mission to find my voice.

Thank you for stopping by and I look forward to connecting with you.

ZJ

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In the background

My shadow
Shouldn’t make me shiver,
But it does.
Perhaps
It conceals
A shame
It’s yet
To shed.

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